<img src="images/theknucklecracker.gif">(set: $full to 0)(set: $distal to 0)(set: $inter to 0)(set: $proxi to 0)(set: $thumb to 0) You begin to feel that familiar yearning in your hands. That creeping tension, the impatient call of your joints for release. It would be unfair to deny yourself of this simple, exquisite pleasure. [[The Full House]] [[The Distal Phalanges<-Just The Tips]] [[The Intermediate Phalanges<-The Middles]] [[The Proximinal Phalanges<-Full On Finger]] [[The Thumb Special]] (set: $full = $full + 1)You steeple your fingers together and push.(if: $full is 1)[Each knuckle cracks at the same time producing a mini-cacophany of pops and cracks, like a forklift over industrial bubblewrap. The noise delights you, but the pleasure is passing. You’ve blown your knuckle wad. Still [[Menu<-plenty more joints to try]]](if: $full is 2)[Not a sound. These Phalanges are spent and all you feel is a slight pain. Wait a few minutes or so to [[The Full House<-try again]]](if: $full is 3)[Still nothing, just the squeak of gristle over bone. The rest of your hand is [[Menu<-still looking pretty sweet]]](set: $distal = $distal + 1)You gently twist the top of each finger.(if: $distal is 1) [ Some are reluctant to give, but eventually you are rewarded with a delicate pop, a sweet subtle sound and with some coaxing a few digits reward you with two sweet snaps. But you must have [[Menu<-MORE!]]](if: $distal is 2)[ The bone moves but nothing happens. Look at the array of [[Menu<-other digits]]](if: $distal is 3)[ Give these little fella's a rest, there are more [[Menu<-bones to crack.]]](if: $distal is 4)[I think you may have some sort of addiction, try again [[Menu<-in a minute.]]](set: $inter = $inter + 1)Slightly more force is needed here. You grab each finger at the base of the middle bit and give a sharp twist.(if: $inter is 1)[ The crack is louder, fuller, more satifying. It lacks the gentle poetics of the fingertips pop, but stands proudly on it's own merits. Other bones are [[Menu<-crying for your attention]]](if: $inter is 2)[Okay, that hurt, and you didn't even get a [[Menu<-gain]] from your pain](if: $inter is 3)[In the twist, you detected a very slight hint of a feeling of the crack to come. I bet, if you just give it [[Menu<-another go...]]](set: $proxi = $proxi + 1)Here's the money. Grabbing the finger full force and tugging it backwards produces (if: $proxi is 1)[a meaty crunch, a loud and forceful snap, a dry stick on a hot day.Savour each finger, for this is the Cigars and Brandy, this is the Top Hat and Spats of the [[Menu<-Knuckle Crack.]]](if: $proxi is 2)[nothing. Sweet FA. You know not to [[Menu<-go back to the well]] too soon.](if: $proxi is 3)[disappointment the likes of which you have never felt before. [[Menu<-But you know you can't stop.]]](if: $proxi is 4)[frustration. It's so close...so...[[Menu<-close...]]] (set: $thumb = $thumb + 1)(if: $thumb is 1)[The secret crack. Sharply push your thumb back and from within the palm of your hand, somewhere down in the Meta Carpals, you hear a deep and butch cracking, an angry whip of a noise. Feel the pride rush through you. [[credit<-You've hit the big leagues.]] But, you know...[[Menu<-practice makes perfect.]]](if: $thumb is 2)[The secret crack. Sharply push your thumb back and feel an agonising and tender pain. This crack is secret and rare.[[Menu<- Slink back in shame.]]](if: $thumb is 3)[The secret crack. Sharply push your thumb back and pause. Surely, you can't be this [[The Thumb Special<-lucky so soon?]]](if: $thumb is 4)[Of course not. It's not about luck, it's about [[Menu<-patience.]]](if: $thumb is 5)[The secret crack. Sharply push your thumb back and curse. You're a fool to your [[Menu<-self.]]](if: $thumb is 6)[The secret crack. Sharply push your thumb back and regret. Is this really it? Is this all you have now. Just the continual self abuse of your hands and fingers, just for a small moment of satisfaction. How did you get so addicted to this? What the hell is wrong with you? Still...I bet if you gave it one...more...[[Menu<-go]]](if: $full is 3)[(set: $full to 0)](if: $distal is 4)[(set: $distal to 0)](if: $inter is 3)[(set: $inter to 0)](if: $proxi is 4)[(set: $proxi to 0)](if: $thumb is 6)[(set: $thumb to 0)] (either: "So many joints, so little time.", "Do it as much as you like, you won't get arthritis.", "Enjoy how much the noise upsets your loved ones", "If knuckle cracking is wrong, do you want to be right?", "Give yourself a treat, why not try cracking your [[neck]].", "Non-Knuckle Crackers will never understand the agony and ecstacy, don't let them try and stop you.") [[The Full House]] [[The Distal Phalanges<-Just The Tips]] [[The Intermediate Phalanges<-The Middles]] [[The Proximinal Phalanges<-Full On Finger]] [[The Thumb Special]] You throw your head violently from side to side. You can hear a faint runching sound with each movement, and eventually the base of your neck lets out a loud crack that will be worth the headache. [[Menu<-It's about time you got back to you hands.]]<img src="images/theknucklecracker.gif"> The Knuckle Cracker was made by me, <a href="http://www.richardtingley.co.uk" target="_blank">Richard Tingley</a>. I hope you enjoyed it. Knuckle Cracking is actually very addictive, [[Menu<-who could blame you for carrying on?]] <center><img src="images/minihead.gif"></center>